shuffle

February 26, 2010

I just feel like writing my heart out. I don’t where to start so I put my player on shuffle mode.

Look After You. The Fray. One of those tearjerker songs. The message isn’t really sad but there is something about the rhythm that moves you. Rhythm! Maybe biorhythm can explain why I feel so sad this week. 

Afraid for Love to Fade.  Lea Salonga. Gawd! I wanna be inspired. It has been a long time since I had that swooning, crazy, lovey feeling. Maybe that explains why I’m bored. Day in, day out, I feel like I’m just part of the statistics. 

You and Me.  Life house. Haaay! I’ll stop this. This is the borderline of my being pathetic.

***

I wanna be anywhere else but where I am. I need company. Silence company. I just want someone to be there and accompany me as I cry without explanation. 

Last song to ponder on. Next: With a Smile. Eraserheads. Haay! I hope I’ll get by with a smile. I hope although it sounds funny, somebody will say it anyway.  Can you never be really too happy in this life? 

home

February 11, 2010

I went to school earlier and saw the Fair. I suddenly got excited. Instead of me feeling old, I felt young. I suddenly remembered the times I was in LB. Why did I stop missing LB? Was it because of QLC? Was it because of that discovery? Was it because of separation issues with friends who remind me of my best times in LB? 

LB used to be my heaven on earth. I said, if indeed your heaven will be your best place on earth, I think when I die, I’d be at Los Banos. But in recent years I just remember the bad times. I’ve forgotten about the oh-so-good times. Shame on me! I feel sorry, really sorry, to my best friends I met at the school that I let the bad time overpower the good ones.

Here are the things I miss: Walkathon therapy sessions * Lunchdates at Indios na laging late ang mga kasama ko * Moccachino / IC’s Frap or just plain 3-in-1 coffee sessions with friends * Uber-high tolerance for alcohol * Gotohan after inuman * St Therese Chapel * Cramming * self-declared holidays * surprise birthday parties * Chismisan hanggang Umaga yet too lazy to attend 7am classes * Amuyongs * H6 * Palaisdaan * Body Mtngs *  GAs  *Household meetings * CSC Sessions * Frat-Soro joint activities * Love Notes * DLS Logbook *Thursday gimiks * Chikahan challenge * Thesis kwitis * Klepto days * TAMBAYAN! * CrayonBox * My fave Ilag’s yosi spot * CEMplangan * Sugal small time * FEBFAIR! * fortuitious events (haha) * college crushes * prof crushes * moments

UPLB used to be home. Home used to be a place. Now home is all the best people I met through UPLB! 

what are the odds?

February 8, 2010

I just can’t believe I let myself lose 3k on one casino night! I spent 8k on retail therapy the other day just because I think I needed to do it because I missed 2010 compre. Gawd! Gusto ko lang sabihin dito kasi ayoko maging TMI sa facebook! Haay! I should reconsider my spending habits! Haay! Nakaka-depressed! I need another retail therapy tomorrow! : (

Focus on the goal, Emcee!

my way of thanking

February 7, 2010

No matter how serious life gets, you will constantly need the company of people whom you can completely be stupid with.

Random fleeting moments of happiness are priceless. These are the impulsive, spontaneous, mischievous, crazy experiences that aren’t that much big-a-deal for others when shared but are the moments you want to capture - take a mental picture/video - and put in your bottle of happy pills. Moments that when reminisced few years down the road will give you natural high no amount of antidepressant pills can replace.

This is my ode to my 2 greatest friends in ‘this’ time of my life - so let me count the few ways I feel so blessed:

1. For the long sessions as if we’ll never see again that soon. 

2. For the endless conversation topics we never seem to run out: the things we agree on, the things we agree to disagree on, and even the shutting off of things we know we’d never agree to disagree on.

3. For the laughters that will make hyenas pale in comparison.

4. For the (invisible) tears that will make us want to double the dosage of laughters right after. Indeed, shared joy is doubled joy. Shared sorrow is half-sorrow.

5. For not just mere sharing dreams, plans and pursuits but also helping me achieve them.

6. For the therapeutic discussions no amount of Spa/Stressball/Stresstabs (haha) can compensate.

7. For the countless art of doing nothing days that will make preschooler kids look more matured than us.

8. For teaching me humility and pride at the same time.

9. For being my constant sounding boards! (Ang hirap kaya maging sounding board ni Emcee)

10. For giving me 101 reasons to go back there even if I only have 1 painful reason not to.

11.  For not merely knowing me but understanding me although I can be a very difficult to understand at time to the point of being a pain in the neck.

12. For being the 2 people I know I’d meet in heaven (Mitch Albom’s concept)

 

I can go on and on but I don’t want to be too much of a Drama Queen.

Mica, I can’t thank you enough. Thanks for being there ALL these years. I know we can make things happen (and I’ve already consulted the Magic8Ball and it confirmed). Good to know we’ve grown up/old together and we will continue to. I’m pretty sure we can finish the 30 Things ‘MC and Mica will do together’ sooner that we expect and before we know it there will be 30 more. Well in fact, we’ve only realized the Choose Your Own Adventure Day after the M8B purchase. haha! I’m super excited! May our Dreamboards come to life! Altiora Peto. Brah, thanks thanks for always sticking around. Good to know we’ve grown young together. Ego boost! You know I’ll do what I can for the Kalabaw Code to materialize. Extra thanks for not just stopping at understanding but also analyzing me (although you can leave the explaining to me). Live relaxed!